The AIM Catastrophe

When I’m at my dead-end job week after week after week, one of the things that helps me get through the day is being able to chat with my wife through AIM. This way we are able to coordinate “tea breaks” and lunches, make jokes about the whiny girl who seats a few feet to my right, and my personal favorite, talk inappropriately to each other.

I still remember that when we first started IMing each other at work, we had agreed that we had to have very proper conversations; so we used to address each other in the most professional way (i.e. Good morning coworker, how do you do?). But when that got a little tiresome, topics about her getting under my desk and how last night was so amazing that we should try again increased by the days. Of course, there’s no way she could actually get under my desk and go unnoticed (however ideas are welcomed), but just being able to take my head off work for a few minutes throughout the day makes these conversations priceless.

Now thankfully, for our financial situations sake, our computer activity isn’t being monitored yet (that we’re aware of), but from time to time, there’s always the one manager that wants you to show them how to do something, and your AIM window is open with the last conversation reading something between the lines of “I really like it when I’m on top.” For the most part, I have been able to sense when someone is walking directly to my cubicle, having enough time to scramble with the mouse to make my little chat window disappear. So that isn’t really a problem at all. However, IMing something to the managers that was meant for my wife is starting to become a trend- a very scary one. It doesn’t happen all the time, and I have to be really tired to make the silly mistake, but when I get messages from my managers that range from “huh?” to “what are you talking about?” I realize that I need to be more careful if I want to keep my job (and hers).

The first accident happened when I IMed “ekjfbpoiuqeftu893p4bt3k gkehrftui23hr5” to one of my managers. Had my wife gotten that, she would have known I was trying to say that I’m confused and she’s not making any sense (I’m weird, don’t judge me), but instead, I get a little confused emoticon from a manager who’s probably thinking that I’m doing something very inappropriate in my desk- lucky for me, she didn’t come to check.

Then it was the time that I IMed “We’re leaving at 2.18 fyi. Let’s hurry so we have enough time ;)” to a different manager- the only one in the office who happens to know about our relationship. So did she know what I was referring to? Well, she has a bachelor’s in English so she is probably very good at reading between the lines. I’m just glad that she didn’t make a big deal about it and that for once, I left out the “bow chicka wow wow” part.

As far as our conversations go, I’m not sure if we’ll stop being inappropriate anytime soon- I have one of the most boring jobs in the planet, hence why I’m writing this entry from the office. But at least I’ve had enough scares now to be a little more careful and double check who I’m sending my messages to.


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