There’s no doubt in my mind that Valentine’s Day is a made-up holiday that benefits no one but businesses. Think about it- you’ll buy flowers and take your girl or dude out to dinner for an over-priced meal if you’re with someone. And if you’re single, you’ll go out and get chocolate because you’re not with someone.
Sure, I didn’t like this day during my teens as no matter how many people I dated, I always ended up single that day. But that’s not the case anymore. Not only do I have a date this time, but I have the best date. So what is my problem with D day now? That I know what is like to be alone in a day that was fabricated to make the single ones feel lonely because they’re single.
So I’m glad this thing will happen on a Monday. We’ll work, then go home and study for the midterm we have on Tuesday. As for the rest of you- celebrate if you must. And don’t worry about having that someone next to you if she/he isn’t there just yet.
When my wife told me about two weeks ago that she would be going away
this weekend, I didn’t realize that my world as I knew it would change radically. It all started when I dropped her off at the airport on Thursday night. I never realized how lonely you could feel driving a car without a hand to hold or a reason to not turn your radio on. That night I made my way home in one of the quietest drives I’ve ever had. Once I got home, I sat in my room for hours trying to adjust to this new and unwanted situation.
See, once you get used to spending most of your time with that someone you love, you also get used to having them there for you. You no longer have to make endless calls on Friday nights trying to figure who’s free and willing to hang out with you. Or wondering what you’re gonna do for dinner because cooking for one is just an impossible task. Or how you really wanna go to that one movie but no one else seems to want to see it too and there’s no way on earth that you’re going by yourself.
Since she left I’ve eaten chips and salsa for dinner, KitKats for breakfast, watched the first and second seasons of Friday Night Lights (currently on the third one), take naps without being tired, leave work early- and I need to stop this list because if I continue, I might finally convince myself that I’m more of a loser than I think I am.
Before her, I was fine being with myself. I could just spend a whole weekend doing nothing at all or doing it all and being at peace with that. But now that I’m without her, I feel incomplete and nothing seems right (as corny as that sounds). My only consolation prize is that she’ll be back tomorrow and I won’t have to feel incomplete again (or lonely or lost or…). Tomorrow I’ll have my better half back, and I can go back to normal me; the one who actually showers and eats more than chips and salsa for dinner.
But for now, I’ll go back to watching the show (nothing like watching small town people make a big deal out of everything to feel better about yourself) while entertaining the idea of getting some donuts to feed my emotional eating cravings.
I miss you, honey.