Tag Archives: Marriage

When It Comes To Marriage, We’ve Forgotten All About Teaching

When I was little, I used to think the world of my teachers. They knew all sorts of cool stuff about subjects like math, geography, grammar, etc., and the best part was that they were always eager to tell us all about it. It took a lot of patience and hard work, but for the most part, they always got through to us- or at least through to me. Their guidance was so essential to my growth as an individual that it was impossible not to think of them as flawless individuals. Continue reading


Married During College

This is bizarre. Only recently have I begun to feel like I’m getting the hang of things around here. Right when I’m about to leave UCLA.

It was more beautiful in person!

There are many things that I wish I could change, but I’m finally realizing that I cannot control everything. In fact, the only thing I can barely try to control is myself. And I even have trouble doing that sometimes.

On the other hand, some things seem to be sailing smoothly. My classes are depressing. They are mostly about poverty and injustice in the world. Yet for some reason, I seem to be very good at them. Mind you, this is just my opinion since I haven’t gotten any midterm grades back, but I really like what I’ve been writing about. For the first time ever, I’ve felt comfortable enough to share my papers with others- this used to terrify me.

Work sucks, but that’s what happens when you work in customer service. Regardless of how awful most people are, there are still the very few who brighten my days with their goodness and¬†wittiness. Like the older couple today in which the sir was making fun of the fact that he does everything his wife “orders” him to do. I smiled and told him that that’s how it’s supposed to be done. We all had a good laugh with that one.

My internship is the same as usual: It’s difficult to get myself there, but when I do, it’s not so bad. However, I am in the middle of a text-argument with a peer intern (I was not the initiator) and I anticipate this will be a problem in the future, since we usually work together. In short, I’m being blamed because I looked out after my own interest AFTER I had offered a solution to benefit both. Hard not to do when the answer to the original offer was: “Well, that’s really your personal situation, not mine.” Ha, if it had been just my situation then why are you yelling at me through text messages now? Life is a joy. I buy Whoppers for moments like this one.

Just kidding, I bought them because a coworker dragged me to CVS during our break to get candy. I didn’t complain.

My relationship with my wife is great as always. Well, not as always (we are human, you know?), but it’s been particularly good lately. I will not lie, the law school application process was a big problem for us at times, but ever since that got sorted out, things have gotten a lot better. Also, as I blogged before, I have a duty to force myself to calm down. For my health and all.

In any case, last night after studying for a while, we went to the Westwood Village and ended up at 800 Degrees Pizza for dinner. It was legit. All of this goodness I’ve been going through is made a thousand times easier because I get to share it with the love of my life. I really don’t understand why most people don’t get married during college. I highly recommend it ūüėČ

Best pizza I’ve ever had!

-Mrs. This One


Dreamy Law School, Revealed

  • So what school was Dreamy Law School (D, you ready?)? Keep reading.

For those of you who have been reading for a bit over a year now (wow, times flies), you’d know that 2011’s V-Day was a nightmare for us. So was the one in 2010. In order to avoid misery for another year, we decided not to do anything special this year- I mean, how could we? I had to work all day, and as soon as I got home from school, I was supposed to work on a midterm paper due the following day. We made absolutely no plans for that day. Not even to get roses.

However, as the day progressed, we’d soon find out that either Life wanted to make it up to us for the last two V-Days, or that Life felt we needed a super awesome gift. Whichever it was, our lives would never be the same after this day.

A little after 1pm, while I was still stuck at work, I got a chance to take a little break. I called my wife to say hi and see if she was having a good day so far. Out of¬†curiosity, I asked her to check my email- you know, my (now cured) law school anxiety had kicked in once more. She told me about some spam I’ve gotten and how that was pretty much it. Until she noticed that she had originally missed an email from Dreamy Law School. My heart skipped a beat. “Read it!” I ordered. “I did,” she replied.¬†The fact that she wasn’t screaming out of happiness made me realize that it probably wasn’t good news. After another second she finally broke the silence.

YOU’RE IN!

I had her read the email to me a few times. I couldn’t believe it. I still can’t, to some degree. This school was so out of my reach, with my low LSAT and all, but THIS was my school. THIS ONE I needed to get into. THIS ONE was my dream school. Now I’m waiting to hear from any scholarship offers. There’s a chance I won’t get any, but I’m staying hopeful.

So why was this such great news? I mean, besides the fact that this was my #1 school? Well, my girl got into the UCLA graduate program. Me getting into this school meant we didn’t have to live far away from each other. Conclusion: best V-Day EVER!

Now, if another local school offers me a lot of money, I’d have to strongly consider it. After all, I’m not about to sell my soul for loans. But in the meantime…

-Deleted-

-Mrs. This One


Ask and You Shall Receive?

As soon as I blogged about scholarships, I got one. Perhaps I should blog about getting into my top choice (DLS) with a full ride? Nah, I’ll save that one for later– but that would definitely be a dream come true.

The scholarship I got is for a school that would put me miles away from my girl (Homewrecker Law School: HLS)*. This is one of the few schools I applied to knowing that the Mrs. wasn’t going to be nearby. I did it because I liked the school, and knowing that, my wife almost forced me to do it. But this set of schools… I never saw myself going to them because I knew they would separate us. They were the type of schools I was allowed to look into only if going to the same area wasn’t going to be a possibility anyway.

So here I am, with a close-to-full-tuition scholarship, without being able to celebrate. I never realized that graduate and professional schooling would pose so many challenges for us. Live and learn, right?

-Mrs. This One

*This school is in NO WAY related or making any references to Harvard Law School which name happens to coincide with the fictitious name I have chosen for a completely, unrelated law school.


Fear

I thought that after I got accepted to law school I’d be overwhelmed with excitement. And I was, until reality hit hard.¬†

Although I was able to overcome my weak LSAT in this admissions cycle, I cannot say the same about this cycle’s financial aid. I was hoping that my GPA and other non-LSAT factors alone would grant me some sort of aid, but scholarship offers have been lacking so far. It makes it slightly scarier that I have seen people with lower numbers (both LSAT and GPA) get something, when I’m still stuck at nada.

As a married student, I have much more to consider than a single student when making a final decision. Every loan I take will belong to a joint debt. And I can’t take this lightly.

I’ve been admitted, but this is only half the journey. Being able to afford it will be the next step.

-Mrs. This One


I’m Going to Law School!

How else could I have titled this?

Ladies and gentlemen, I have received my first offer of admission! You are welcome to side with my wife and say “we already knew this was going to happen,” but I really didn’t. Though now I do.

Not only was I accepted to a school, but I got accepted to a school I would totally love to go to. Although I won’t be revealing the names of the schools until I have picked a school to attend, I can tell you that this school definitely stands for everything I stand for: public service. They are also a bit unconventional, and located at the heart of a beautiful city. Hint: if I were to go there, I would miss the candid California weather.

But we will have to wait to make a decision since we’re a pair, and once you’re part of a pair, a decision is always reached by the two parts of the pair. Well, only if you’re part of a good pair.

Mrs. This One


My Wife is Baking a Cake and I…

May have just finished the first half of summer school. I say “may have” because I am in the middle of a project, which I submitted yesterday, but had to edit it again today. If the professor likes this last edit, I may be actually allowed to say that I’m free from school for at least 5 days- pretty sad, I know.

I took my final yesterday and I haven’t got a clue of what grade I will get in the class. It breaks my heart that I don’t know. I used to be an A student. But then you get married, and you have a job, and you’re tired all the time, and then you’re just not an A student anymore. Is it worth it still? You betcha! Did I not mention my wife is baking a cake?

But what happens when that one coworker who’s always chatty and friendly sees us kissing the other day when I dropped off my wife at school? Apparently more than I thought it would. She saw us Tuesday. Today, I happened to work with her. Let’s call her Stacey.

I am very selective as to who I come out to at work. Not because I’m not “out and proud,” but because I live in L.A., and you never know who has some hatred in them ready to be triggered. It also has something to do with the fact that I work closely with different people. If there’s something not working well between me and a coworker, it disrupts the pace and makes me miserable.

When I was told I would work with her, I thought it would be okay. I still remember how big her eyes widened when she saw us. Since I was in the car, I could pretend I didn’t see her. Which I did. I still thought that maybe, it would all be okay- Except that… today, she wasn’t chatty. Or friendly. Or anything. She was short, didn’t look me in the eyes, and avoided contact with me, when she could. I really wanted to tell her that I’m not contagious, but I refrained.

It’s only been one day and she could have been having a long/awful day- after all, I don’t (always) think that the world spins around me. But I sure hope that what I think is happening isn’t happening. It would really put a lot more stress at work and that is not what I need right now.

-MTO

P.S.: And in case you were wondering, it is a chocolate strawberry cake.


Dusting Off the iPod

I stopped listening to music pretty much after marriage. Okay, I do listen to it every now and then when I drive, but since we’re usually in the car together, we talk and music simply becomes background noise. Music isn’t an activity I look for on purpose anymore.

I suppose that music could be a great way to fill gaps that people leave sometimes- there are songs about love, friendships, and well, life in general. But I guess once those gaps are less noticeable, music isn’t that big of a deal. But the Mrs. had two iTunes gift cards and if she wasn’t gonna get any new tunes, I wouldn’t let the opportunity just walk by.

After adding a few songs however, it made me realize that I miss jamming and losing myself in the rhythm of a good song. So maybe I’ll try and befriend my iPod more often. And in case you were wondering, these are my newest additions (and some words about why I got ’em):

  1. “When I get you Alone” by Thicke Because it’s pure awesomeness.
  2. “Sweet Disposition” by The Temper Trap I heard this track while watching “500 days of summer,” so I had to have it.
  3. “Panic Switch” By Silversun Pickups Because it makes me sing every time they play it on the radio.
  4. “The Runaways” (Album) by The Runaways I watched the movie “The Runaways” not too long ago and I fell in love with this band. I promise it has nothing to do with Kristin Stewart playing yet another lesbian role. Okay maybe it has something to do with it.
  5. “What’s my Name?” by Rihanna & Drake I almost didn’t admit to this, but this song has a nice beat to it.
  6. “Such Great Heights” by The Postal Service Heard it in Grey’s Anatomy. Enough said.
  7. “Lisztomania” by Phoenix My wife used to listen to this song all the time when we were dating…
  8. “So What” by P!nk It’s Pink so I don’t think I need a reason.
  9. “Laura No Esta” by Nek Italian singers drive me crazy!
  10. “What it Feels Like for a Girl” by Madonna The one Madonna song I didn’t have.
  11. “Entre tu y Mil Mares” by Laura Pausini Another Italian singer. She’s perhaps my favorite.
  12. “I Love Rock & Roll”(Album) ¬†by Joan Jett and The Blackhearts Same as #4.
  13. “Bad Reputation”(Album) by Joan Jett Ibid.
  14. “What the Hell” by Avril Lavigne Post-divorce music, needed to know what she’s about nowadays.
  15. “Cuando Nadie me Ve” by Alejandro Sanz This Spanish singer’s voice is just amazing… This guy sings with his soul. Same for the following three songs.
  16. “Corazon Partio” by Alejandro Sanz
  17. “Quisiera Ser” by Alejandro Sanz
  18. “El Alma al Aire” by Alejandro Sanz

Planning the Honeymoon

Because we had been talking about marriage recently, my wife caught me by surprise the other day when she asked me where I’d like to go for our honeymoon. It could be because we’re trying to barely make it by with our salaries, or that because our “wedding” is far from being legal, but I have never given this issue any real thought.¬†It should make sense though- most people know that they’re going to get married and go on their honeymoon eventually, so they plan for it for a long time. I think.

After her question, I just kept quiet. Unlike the Mrs. who has been to Canada, Mexico, England and Ireland, the furthest I’ve gone from home has been… well, California. Following the silence she asked me to simply name the place I’ve always been wanting to go to. “Egypt! But not for a honeymoon,” I said. So where would I like to go? Hawaii? Canada? Italy? Greece? England? I’m truly not sure. How do you even begin to pick a place?

It is obvious that we’re not going anytime soon but you can’t blame a girl from fantasizing. Although I don’t travel much, it is still my desire to do so. So maybe I can start planning for that trip now. Whenever it happens.

-Mrs. This One


Guess What Mom & Dad…

So, I’m very embarrassed and more than ever frustrated with myself, but I have a confession to make. Despite the fact that my parents have been nothing but supportive of my sexuality; Despite the fact that my family has embraced my wife better than I could have imagined, I have yet to tell my parents about our domestic partnership.

It’s not like I don’t want to, but it’s been so long since it happened that I feel like they’ll be offended, and worse, disappointed. “Why didn’t you tell us?” Or my sister, “Why didn’t you talk to me about it? You could have at least told me.” As my wife can tell you, I hate conflict, and for financial aid purposes, it has recently become necessary for me to tell my parents so that they can sign a form saying that they won’t claim me for 2010 taxes. I need to do it soon also as the FAFSA is due in just over a month, and the form is due way before this.

Today, I’ve been thinking up ways to do it. Should I tell my mom only and have her break the news to my dad? Should I tell them both at once to be fair? How do I start? “Mom, Dad, I got married” or “Mom, Dad, I eloped” is more proper. “Mom, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is I was afraid to tell you I got married, but the good news is I get a lot more aid starting soon!” Any suggestions?

I feel like an awful daughter and an even more awful wife. It’s not at all that I’m ashamed to have gotten married. I couldn’t have imagined it any other way. Even the fact that it wasn’t necessarily the most romantic “wedding” (standing in a Mailboxes, etc., waiting to see the notary before saying our “I Do’s,” while people flooded the office during the 4:55 PM rush to get things mailed out after work) doesn’t bother me. To be honest, I’ve never wanted a big wedding, and just having my wife by my side was perfect enough for me.

Well anyone out there, wish me luck! I’ll need it…


%d bloggers like this: